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Thursday, May 29, 2008

Out of Office Reply: It's My Birthday So Don't Try and Reach Me

I'm out of town for the next couple of days. I'm heading to...[GULP!]...Utah to visit Bryce Canyon and other great natural wonders. I'm hopeful to have some great photos and videos of beautiful landscapes, see some crazy critters, enjoy the scenic countryside, and have some much-needed (but probably not much-deserved) fun & frolic, if not some relaxation.

This week marked the one year anniversary of our initial cross-country drive to our new Vegas home. It is fitting that one year later we are going back to the state we swore we'd only go to if there were some VERY good reason. Utah is kinda awful to drive through if you have worries about dying on a barren highway with no hope of ANYONE finding you. More on that later.

In any event I truly hope this, my thirty-fucking-eighth year of life, will somehow bring me closer to easing some money woes, maybe even finding myself as a successful entertainer (as in, way more successful than the so-called living I've made thus far, pre-2008), and getting a little better at being a happier person in general.

Though I doubt any of that is possible for a guy like me. ;)


Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Yellow Book Report: Part One: The First Call

Last Wednesday I received my very first response to my Yellow Book Yellow Pages ad. I can say it was my FIRST call because until this year I'd never even been in ANY town's Yellow Pages.

Feel free to see my previous post about my ads and my reasons for never placing ads there before.

It was nice to get a response the same week the ad broke. It was rather encouraging, especially since I've been extremely depressed about my lack of entertainment work. My goal and subsequent streak of booking ONE event a month (to at least make me FEEL like I'm still an entertainer) will be coming to an end this month, unless something changes SOON!

The first call? [sigh]
A birthday party...for a (get this) TWO YEAR OLD. Yep. Them pre-toddlers just LOVE comedians and jugglers.

When was this birthday party? [sigh] The very next day. Not that I wasn't available. I just knew the person would have NO budget. I quoted a VERY reasonable (extremely cheap) price for the event and hoped for the best.

The result? [sigh] "Oh. [pause] Really? [pause] Um...well I've got to call a few more people first, but I'll let you know. [CLICK]."

Still and all, it was a call in response to my ad. As the Mythbusters say, any result is a result.

I'm keeping tabs on how "successful these ads will be so when the salesman calls next year I can tell him why I will or will not be continuing my advertisement. So for those keeping score...

"Party Planning Service" Category:
One Call, No Booking

"Entertainment - Family" Category:
No Calls, No Bookings

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Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Nothing to Report

I hope to have something I can talk about soon. Until

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Birthday Wish

If anyone reading this was planning on getting me a birthday present, a card, or any sort of object to commemorate the 38th year of life (May 30), may I please make this little request?

Send me the cash equivalent instead.

Even if it is the two bucks you'd spend on a card, send me that instead of the card. There are a few things going on that are taxing what little savings I have and I rather doubt I'm going to get any gigs anytime soon. I have no need for DVDs, clothes, and other comforts or things that would make celebrating another year of life a tad more fun. I need the cash to make certain I can continue to live in a house. I really need to live in a house. It is getting rather hot outside and living outside is not a good option. I've seen the homeless on D Street and Main. I don't even know how to make a makeshift tent out of towels and boxes. I'd burn up out there.

So please, that thing you were going to get me? Send a check. If you already got it, return it then send a check.

If you were not planning on any sort of gift, that's way cool too. I don't expect them as it is so i won't be missing them.

Thursday, May 15, 2008


If something doesn't give SOON...

Anyway, three "ding" e-mails regarding work ("DING" = rejections) within three days (the only prospects I had for paying bills on time, fulfilling my goal of having a gig a month. not going crazy with depression and anxiety) doesn't make for a happy Andy.

Expect dour posts until about September, assuming I can afford the internet service until then.

This is BAD


Been Entertaining Guests

Since it seems unlikely I'll be entertaining anyone else for some time, it seems only right that I tend to my house guests. Although, I've had to work much of the time they've been here and they've also been too tired to do much "fun" anyway. No worry, I'm doing a fine job of being entertaining!

Saturday, May 10, 2008

Movie Lines I Relate to All Too Often

From Kingpin:

"How's Life?"

"Taking forever."

Thursday, May 08, 2008


Waiting to hear about some potential new gigs.
Waiting to start rehearsing with a new partner on a new endeavor.
Waiting to be able to tell you about said endeavor.
Waiting for a day when I'm considerably less worried about my choice in careers being a good one.
Waiting for SOMEONE locally to call me about a gig.
Waiting for some friends to arrive.
Waiting to see if I'll ever be able to buy a house.
Waiting for someone to actually convince me that buying a house is a good idea (no, equity isn't a convincing argument).
Waiting for the other shoe to drop (I've gone through many pairs of dropped shoes already).
Waiting for delivery of more "droppin' shoes".

Waiting to die.

You're caught up.

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

Iron On the Fire

Maybe someday I'll be able to tell you about it. That is to say, I may have a few gigs this month to talk about. Also, there's the potential for some bigger things, but I can't talk about them because the guy in charge of those things has asked me not to talk about them as of yet.


Nothing to see here. Move along.

Sunday, May 04, 2008

One Singular Goal (sort of)

What once was a job I truly loved and enjoyed is now killing me quickly. For reasons I cannot go into here, I have been regretting ever taking the job for about 2 1/2 months.

That being said, I N-E-E-D the job far too much. I am not at all making any sort of living as an entertainer (yet) and while there is a light at the end of that tunnel, that light is merely a pinhole through a dark curtain as opposed to an actual light of hope.

I have always hoped to make myself as busy with the entertainment as when I was in Chicago and I still believe that will happen. If possible I'd maintain a full-time job along with my full-time entertainment responsibilities. A little extra cash and some much-needed relief from self-employed tax burden (as well as some other debts I cannot mention here) can surely help. If not possible, I'd keep the "day job" (which I'm stuck doing night shift all the fucking time now) as a part-time paycheck and entertain more often.

With all the shit going on there I can only see myself s
taying on part time (or at all) if the entertainment thing gets a serious jump start pretty damn soon. Not holding my breath.

So I have one singular goal (and one kind of ancillary goal): Focus all my available time and energy to getting entertainment work (both in an entertainment office, like back in Chicago and on stage) so I can either shit-can the day job or make it a part time thing. I can tolerate most anything when pressed to do so. Tolerating is much easier when I'm not there all the time.

The secondary goal is to get out of this job altogether and get into a better (and equally as flexible) one. Resumes are going out again this week - BIG TIME!

I'm TRYING to keep a stiff upper lip. I'm REMINDING myself how much I like it here and how I believe I was brought here for a reason. I am DOING MY BEST to keep it together and not fall into a crippling depression. None of that gets the bills paid and keeps the proverbial ulcer from burning through my gut.

Saturday, May 03, 2008

Count on the Home Town

So what if the Carol Stream paper didn't care about losing one of their own to Las Vegas thanks to the big microburst thing and that same lost resident wound up in a national TV commercial? Marengo, Illinois (the longest-running of all of my "home towns") managed to care.

Check out the current issue of the Marengo-Union View (page 29 of 44 if you read the pdf file online) and you'll see my press release featured inside. I would have liked to do an interview or something, but at least they printed most of the press release I sent them. Very nice.


Friday, May 02, 2008

The Happy Couple is Blogging

If anyone is interested, here is the Honeymoon Blog of Kurt & Colette. One day there'll be photos from the wedding, videos, etc. At least i think that's what they'll be doing. I know they'll be in Vegas in a few weeks. Is having the bachelor party AFTER the wedding going to be an issue?