I Got Nuthin'.

I got nuthin' of any substance to talk about today.


But I do have some SPAM with Bacon
in my fridge!

Leave it to Hormel to come up with pork, laced with bacon.

I LOVE SPAM!

MMMmmm...Hickory Smoke SPAM!

You know if a scan of a new flavor of SPAM is on the old blog,
then surely there must be a new episode of Podcrapular
hitting the world shortly.

Could this be the return of both Andy Land AND Podcrapular?

Is it possible that I am simply too dumb
to think of anything else to post?

Perhaps I am just a big loser with some sort
of salty, canned pork addiction.

Indeed, all are possible, if not completely likely.

God Bless America!

I wouldn't want to live anywhere that doesn't allow for Hot & Spicy SPAM to happen!

What Goes Well with SPAM???

You may be wondering, after a very long and fun-filled first day with my wife, how could I top a trip to a cave, a casino and of course, the SPAM Museum? Well if you shorten the question a bit you get, "How could I top SPAM?" One "topping" comes to mind and you can find THOUSANDS of varieties of that special topping at...

Oh yeah, baby! That's what I'm talkin' about...The Mount Horeb Mustard Museum! You may have seen them mentioned or profiled on many a Food Network special, in magazines, or even heard tell of this magnificent place from people fortunate enough to have been there. If not, gather 'round, kiddies cuz you're gonna learn something GOOD!

April and I got to check out this museum of many mustards last year. We enjoyed the place so much we made a couple of subsequent trips. Each trip found us leaving the store with anywhere from $50.00 to $100.00 worth of delectable mustards from around the globe.

I have always been a mustard guy. For me, ketchup is for your French Fires, hash browns, just about any fried potato. It is NOT EVER for your hot dogs. It CAN be for your hamburgers. It should not otherwise be discussed, especially when in the presence of the best damned condiment ever devised, MUSTARD! You can imagine that any place called The Mustard Museum would be quite a treat for me.

Indeed, The Mount Horeb Mustard Museum is a treat for just about anyone. Started as a hobby (to forget the pain of multiple Red Sox World Series losses), the Mustard Museum evolved as a haven for over 4,000 different jars & varieties of mustard in the world's largest, if not the only collection of mustards in the world. It is now among the silliest and happiest places on Earth.

The Museum collection of mustards from days gone by and current classics is free for all to see. Honestly, who needs to look at the history of mustards throughout the ages when the hundreds, if not thousands of varieties available for tasting and purchase within the store is more than enough to impress the mustard fan in all of us.

April was never a mustard person. Our first trip had her doubting I'd EVER use all of the jars of mustards I'd purchased. Then I introduced her to the culinary marriage of mustard with cheese (arguably, her favorite food). Add some wine and fruit and before too long we were out of mustard. Our next trip had her finding flavors of her own and some damn good ones to boot.

Since I cook a lot and come up with many good recipes around here, I began to take full advantage of the mustardy goodness found at our trips to the Museum and used more and more mustards in my meals. By the time we headed out to The Mustard Museum for my Birthday Week we had only a few jars of mustard left in the old fridge. Clearly we needed MORE!

This time around brought home some amazing taste sensations like Oktoberfest beer mustard, garlic & wine mustard, huckleberry mustard, and many more. You are free to taste every single variety they offer for purchase before you buy and everyone working there is an expert on the subject.

When I get my scanner back I'll be sure to show you some of the labels and varieties. Until then I can't recommend HIGHLY ENOUGH that you visit the Mustard Museum website and the shop itself, should you be in Mt. Horeb, Wisconsin any time soon. You'll find that the folks there have a great sense of humor and are eager to make mustard-believers out of you.

I also have it on good authority that yours truly will be performing at this year's annual National Mustard Day celebration on Saturday August 6, 2005. Put that baby on your calendars because I am going to try and really do something special for these folks. I'm even willing to take some of my fee in mustard!

Holy Crap! It's the SPAM Museum!

That's right, you heard me, THE SPAM MUSEUM! I don't know where YOU thought I'd be kicking off my Birthday Week, but I can't imagine why anyone would want to go anywhere else to celebrate such an occasion!

We drove on the 30th for as long as we could, heading north into Wisconsin. Our destination? Austin, Minnesota to bask in the porcine goodness that is the SPAM Museum.

Of course, lack of sleep and several deer throwing themselves in front of my car made me pull off in Sparta for the night. However, Sparta seems damn cool in it's own right and I'm glad I stopped because NOW I have another fun place to go with April some day!

As strange as this will sound, April & I have been wanting to check out the SPAM Museum for a few years now.

My original intent was to be there for the grand opening because my hero, Joe Walsh, was scheduled to play. He cancelled and I never went.

As time went by our desire to check out the SPAMMY goodness grew.

Simply put, the SPAM Museum is one of the most excellent chunks of Americana around.

There is no admission so it already has my attention. It celebrates a product rich in history, maligned by people everywhere, and yet loved by BILLIONS worldwide. It is also one place that NEVER takes itself too seriously and you know I am all bout that!

SPAM is just one of those products. Life would be hard to imagine had it not come about. Think about it, SPAM has been a part of our lives for DECADES. Vegetarians may not understand nor would they care to, but SPAM helped keep this nation and others ALIVE during World War II. At the SPAM Museum you learn about the history of the product, the ways it fed the world and the military during our toughest times.

You also learn that Hawaii is the single largest consumer of SPAM on the planet! I'm sure that Doyle, Christine, and Ma would have a few fine recipes to share with us. LOL!

What else is there at the SPAM Museum? Well I'd say that a campy, semi-animated puppet show giving a brief "This is Your Life" style tale of SPAM would certainly be something to grab your attention.

You can also play a SPAM trivia game that is held inside it's very own simulated TV studio. I imagine this place is HOPPIN' when there are large touring groups sitting in the studio audience.

You can play SPAM games, listen to radio and TV spots, see movies, get recipes from around the world, listen to SPAM songs, sample different varieties of SPAM, and of course...SHOP! They have one kick-ass gift shop.

Yessir, there sure is a lot to see once you walk through these doors.

Of course, I must be forgetting SOMETHING.

There's an interactive SPAM internet cafe where you can sign up for the SPAM fan club, but that's not all that important to mention.

OH YEAH! I remember now!

At the end of the tour you can sit in a replica of the set used during Monty Python's famous "SPAM Sketch"! There's a TV playing the sketch on a continuous loop, a giant Viking, chairs, a sign for the cafe, and all the hilarity that accompanies Python and SPAM. It is the PERFECT photo opportunity for freaks like you and me!

You can even get your own can of the limited edition SPAMALOT variety of SPAM. How freakin' cool is that?

I would recommend the SPAM Museum to anyone with a sense of humor and a love for canned spiced ham. And yes, they do tell you ALL of the ingredients inside a can of SPAM.

As you can see, I certainly enjoyed our first stop during Birthday Week. Of course, there is so much more to tell you!

Stay tuned.

Monty Python's SPAMALOT!

Yesterday my wife and I were fortunate enough to see Monty Python's SPAMALOT! We'd made it a goal to see the show last year when we first heard about it and DAMN are we glad we made this happen!

I know my opinion doesn't matter for much. I mean, I am NO Larry King! But if you'll indulge me.

This is a genuine treat! Extremely funny and very entertaining. Even the folks who have never heard of Monty Python (Yes, there ARE some out there! Very sad!) will enjoy this production. There is enough Python for the true fans and enough other genuinely great humor and music for the hardcore Broadway freaks.

What I liked best about this was how they made fun of Broadway musicals and maintained a general sense of Monty Python silliness. There is no doubt in my mind that this will be a successful endeavor for Eric Idle.

More importantly, they have the BEST souvenirs! Check out the photo of the collectible can of SPAM! I'm sure that they tried a similar promotion when doing Sweeney Todd or Cats, but the FDA & USDA probably had a fit!

They sold coconut shells for folks who wanted to simulate horses galloping, great t-shirts, DVDs, and of course the SPAM. Lots of fun for everyone.

I liked the original material even more than the classic lines and routines from the film. Tim Curry, David Hyde Pierce, and Hank Azaria were all excellent. The supporting cast should all be stars after this run. It was a great time for everyone. If it ever leaves Broadway (after its DEBUT run in Chicago...We're so cool!) I highly recommend you check it out!