20th Reunion...Didn't "Miss it"

Yup, I didn't go. I know, big surprise. Did I "miss it"? Not really. I wanted to know who had RSVP'd and knowing might have actually made me consider going, but they didn't want to tell me and thought it would be somehow inappropriate to post a list online...event though online was how they were primarily contacting and conversing with people (Classmates.com, Yahoo group, etc.)

So the question is, would I consider going to the 25th reunion? Definitely. Will I go? Who knows? Depends upon a lot of things. My own life situation, the economy, the price of a plane ticket - lots of things will factor into a decision to go to something as ridiculous as a high school reunion.

What would make the decision easier for me? That is to say (not that anyone missed me there this time around nor do they give a shit if I do or not), what would make a "yes" decision more likely from me? Here are a few suggestions.

A) A little more lead time. I think I was contacted about this a month, maybe two before the thing was set. I don't really think there was that much planning involved since they had to change the venue at the last minute and really, something like this, especially if you are among the fortunate who moved far away from Marengo (nice town, liked my time...I MOVED ON!), you need more time to make plans. Airfare costs money, especially these days and something like that will not ever really make me rush out to buy a ticket without more notice. You've got FIVE YEARS, people. Make this seem like a good idea NOW and maybe everyone alive will be there for the 25th.

B) Have it somewhere more exciting than Marengo, Illinois. I'll pay extra to go somewhere more glamorous. Really I will. Having something to do AFTER the party is fun too. You can't do that in or around Marengo, Illinois. I tried. It isn't possible unless you plan on fucking some chick on Burma Road. You don't have to have the reunion in the same town you graduated in for it to be a reunion of graduates from the same high school. Apparently the first time around (10 year reunion) it was held in...OOHHH...Rockford, Illinois ("the BIG city" to many folks I guess) and I have no idea if that one was better attended than this one. All I know is that having it in a town 30 miles away is about the same as having it in the same small town you graduated from. It really only caters to the folks who never left the area code and doesn't make folks who found out there's more beyond the city limits of Smallville want to attend. There are plenty of good places and venues to hold such an event in the big city (NOT Rockford) or surrounding areas or even in another state. Just stop trying to make the homecoming game and parade a reason to attend the event. Good lord.

C) Seriously, tell us who is actually going. I can't speak for everyone but I am certain more would have gone if they knew which, if any, of their actual friends from high school were attending. Our damn graduating class was so small and clique-ish that it wouldn't surprise me if many folks abstained from the celebration simply because they didn't want to be stuck having to make happy-conversation with most of the folks they hated back then and hate now. What's worse, they might be struck with the prospect of finding out someone was ONLY an asshole then and NOW is someone worth knowing. NONE of those fucktards who hated my guts and made my life miserable then deserve my enjoying their new found "nice guy" persona now. I wouldn't want that for myself an I wouldn't want that for anyone else, even the fucktards. Sometimes surprises are nice. We all change and 20+ years can make a huge difference, but let some things be sacred...like the belief that you really ARE better than the fucktards who made high school suck.

NOTE: "Fucktards" is a phrase invented by my lovely wife, April. She also owns the copyright and I owe her a few bucks for using it so many times.

D) Post some photos from the 10-year and the 20-year reunion. People might feel like they truly missed something if we actually saw some of the fun we missed out on in the first place. At the very least, show me and my fellow classmates some photos of what the ladies look like today. I'd love to see what these people look like without awfully high 80's hair. ;)

Anyway, I'm sure I'll speak more of this some other time. I just can't help but think that attending my 25th reunion is just as out of the question. I'm always open to anything, given how crazy my life is most of the time. However, without some of the aforementioned suggestions in place...pretty doubtful. Maybe if I have my own show on the Strip I can afford to fly these folks out to a really cool town for a reunion. Not that they'd go. Can't venture must farther than Union or they might explode.