Ten Things Tuesday: BAD Fortune Cookies, A.K.A., Misfortune Cookies

• Today is the LAST day of the rest of your life.
• My dad can beat up your dad.
• Confucius Say, “Pay your fucking bill and leave, already!”
• While man waste time at buffet I give my “Sweet & Sour Pork” to his wife.
• What did you expect, some chick's phone number? GODDAMN, boy! Quit looking into baked goods for guidance, you putz!
• Learn to speak Chinese. 疱疹 , “pàozhěn” = Herpes
• Today you will win one million dollars! OK, I was just fucking with you. Now that I have your attention, you’ve really got cancer.
• The Cubs will not win the World Series this year either.
• If the grass is greener on the other side of the fence you might live next to Motörhead.
• “Peking Duck” is code for “Chef who wears no pants”.

Thanks to Golfwidow for the suggestion.

This completes the Golfwidow Trilogy. ;)

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