Next Stop...Niagara Cave

After completing our pilgrimage to the "CRAZY TASTY" SPAM Museum, it was time to head back towards Wisconsin for the next part of our journey. Of course, being ones to not adhere much to plans when traveling and having a good time, we decided to make a stop in Harmony, Minnesota so we could check out the Niagara Cave.

I have loved going to caves for many years. April had never been to one until last year. Even though she can get very claustrophobic, she LOVED her first cave experience and it seemed like a grand idea to go to another one. I'd never been to Niagara Cave and since this was April's first visit to Minnesota and only her second cave I knew this would be new to her as well.

I found out there are actually two caves you can visit in this area of Minnesota. We chose the Niagara Cave because it seemed to promote the visit more than the other one and boasted some fascinating things to see inside. Not the least of which is a 60-foot waterfall. Boy are we glad we chose this one.

There is such a calming effect on you when inside a cave. The temperature is always a bit chilly, but soothing. The smell is that of fresh, clean water & limestone. The sounds of water dripping and echoing lightly throughout the system are always enjoyable. And the formations are beyond comprehension. So many randomly-occurring flowstone creations end up resembling easily recognizable objects, like "The Dolphin" found here. There are even formations inside resembling an elephant, a skeletal arm, shark fins, and an old man's face.

How can you NOT enjoy looking at the magnificent Earthly creations found within a cave? They are just breathtaking to behold.

This tour gives you quite a workout as you end up walking about 500 stairs, back & forth throughout the cave. You end up walking a good couple of miles I'd say. Of course, if you're in to this sort of thing, the tour could traverse 20 miles and it would be over too soon.

We were fortunate enough to only have one other person on our tour so it was as if the entire cave was our own.

Maybe it has something to do with the air or the ambiance, but caves are very romantic I must say.


Of course, maybe it has something to do with the fact that so many formations look like giant vaginas.

Don't believe me?

Behold! The first of MANY different vaginal formations we encountered inside Niagara Cave.

I have way too many photos of the cave to share here. I'd say about 20 of them are different forms of, to quote The Very Famous Lance Vegas, "The Va-Geeje". It got to be kind of funny after awhile. I may have to do a separate blog post to prove my pint here. For now, simply take my word for it. Lots of Hoo-Ha in the Niagara Cave.

Now don't think I saw anything remotely feminine in these formations. April was the first to point out any strange vaginal resemblances here.

I am from Chicago and I don't see things like that when I look at stains and crevices formed by nature. No, I see the Virgin Mary.

Anyway, as I said we had a most excellent time at the cave. The tour was not very expensive and the memories are absolutely priceless. Caves are among the most unusual and fascinating things our planet can create. If you haven't visited any then you are really missing out on life.

Incidentally, you can see much more than giant vaginas inside a cave. In fact, the Niagara Cave likes to exploit both sexes equally.

For the ladies in da house, to paraphrase Monty Python, "here's a gratuitous picture of penises" found inside the cave. I have some better ones, but I'll save those for the separate post, fully shocking and amazing you all.

It is quite amazing what you can find inside a cave. What surprised me the most was that a little exploring provided me with an image of one GIGANTIC PRICK!


Stay tuned, kids! I still haven't completed day one of our journey!