Andy Martello's Tales from Andy Land!

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This Still Makes Me Laugh

2012-02-14T00:34:00.000-08:00

Click for a larger image.

While you're at it, read my column from several years back
The Folly of valentine's Day

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Ladies & Gentlemen...The Duck Song

2012-02-13T00:34:00.000-08:00

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This Guy is HEE-LARIOUS!

2012-02-12T00:34:00.000-08:00

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George Takei will probably post this. ;)

2012-02-11T00:34:00.000-08:00

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Of course I like PENGUINS!

2012-02-10T00:34:00.000-08:00

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Read. Share. Repeat.

2012-02-09T00:34:00.000-08:00

Please read my current column at the North Las Vegas Voice.

What's in a Name?

Page 4. Send it to your friends.

:)

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The Chuck Jones Experience

2012-02-08T01:16:00.000-08:00

I love being able to find new and fun things to do in Las Vegas. Recently, The Chuck Jones Experience opened up at Circus Circus and few people could be as happy as I was to hear that bit of news!

If you miss the Warner Brothers stores at your shopping malls, are a fan of the GREAT Chuck Jones, or have always wished there was a museum you could play with, then this is your lucky day.

Fun, educational, & interactive, The Chuck Jones Experience features tons of original artwork and sketches from throughout the career of one of the greatest names in animation. You'll feel like you're inside a Looney Tunes cartoon and enjoy learning about the man behind some of the world's most memorable characters.

Full of exhibits that will appeal to any age guest, this is easily one of my favorite new things to do in Sin City. They opened two weeks ago and have a ten-year lease at the hotel. Here's hoping they are there the entire time and drawing big crowds every single day.

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[SIGH!]

2012-02-07T01:25:00.000-08:00

That's all I have to say about that.

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Already Jonesin' for Football Stuff?

2012-02-06T00:34:00.000-08:00

Enjoy learning about where the best
helmets in football are made!

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Not My Worst Night in Vegas. :)

2012-02-05T00:34:00.000-08:00

The Price is Right Live meets The Price is Right

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How is it possible?

2012-02-04T00:34:00.000-08:00

Much in the same way I have a difficult time believing that more networks don't play Planes, Trains, & Automobiles on Thanksgiving, I am equally confused when I can't find anyone playing Groundhog Day on...well, Groundhog Day.

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What's in a Name?

2012-02-03T00:34:00.000-08:00

Please head to the North Las Vegas Voice
website to read my latest column on page 4.
http://www.northlasvegasvoice.net

Once you're done, LIKE them on Facebook and rave about my writing!
https://www.facebook.com/northlasvegasvoice

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A Busy, Fun Day Tomorrow

2012-02-02T13:30:00.000-08:00

Rehearsing at TPIRL now, then the show at 2:30.
Tomorrow will be a busy one. Dropping off my billboard, stopping by a casino collectibles show, TPIRL, then off to the Adam Ant concert. WHEW!

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Big Changes in February

2012-02-01T00:34:00.000-08:00

Thanks to some other big changes in my life, which I choose not to discuss publicly at this time, I am hoping to make a few big changes this month. Not the least of which is a month of no alcohol.

I'm not at all worried that I drink too much or anything like that. However I have packed on some serious pounds since around mid-November and very much of that has to do with a rather large increase in drinking, accompanied by a large decrease in activity. So...

As a type of body cleanse I will be reviving my once-great tradition of riding my bike and walking every day as well as spending the month without alcohol. I of course will increase other activities and resume some of my healthier eating habits.

Yes, I realize I picked the shortest month of the year to go without a drink. Yes, that is completely a strategic move. ;) WAIT—this is a leap year? DAMMIT!

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One Month

2012-01-31T09:45:00.000-08:00

Yeah, I know that there are not as many readers as there once were (my fault).
I'm aware that I haven't posted nearly as many "brilliant" or "interesting" things as I have in the past (was I ever brilliant or interesting?)
Sure, even though Blogger (a Google product) is better for getting things into the searches, I realize many more people are using Word Press these days.

WHO CARES?

The important thing is that I have managed to get off my duff and return to blogging as promised. This represents one full month of blog posts and for me, it's a minor victory.

Activity breeds followers by increasing internet presence and boosting your name in the search engines. All of this can lead to more work and better promotion of my various projects. Mostly it means that I did in fact make sure to take a little time from my day and write again. That's very important, especially since I need to finish the final revisions of my book and get it ready for editing and publishing this year (It will happen in 2012. I know it!).

If nothing else I managed to get some dude angry enough to force me to disable reader comments for now. I must be doing something right. ;)

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Comments...

2012-01-30T18:31:00.001-08:00

For the time being, readers will not be allowed
to leave comments on some threads.

Sorry for any inconvenience.

- The Management.

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Leaving On A Jet plane

2012-01-29T10:51:00.000-08:00

However I do know when I'll be back again. Tuesday night. Will try to get a blog post up and running while on R&R.

Until then, please enjoy this commercial announcement.

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Big Things a Coming!

2012-01-28T00:34:00.000-08:00

Of course...I can't talk about them right now.

So...

Enjoy this commercial announcement.

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This is Devon Sawa...

2012-01-27T00:34:00.000-08:00

You may call him...Devon Sawa.
(Thanks, Hayley)

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My Only Gwyneth Paltrow Post

2012-01-26T00:34:00.000-08:00

Genetics made Gwyneth Paltrow beautiful.

GLEE made Gwyneth Paltrow HOT & NAUGHTY!

Say what you will, but the world is a better place for that.

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Wisdom and Patience

2012-01-25T00:34:00.000-08:00

The things I am not saying tell the bigger story.

If you can be as patient as I am, one day I will tell the bigger story.

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Looking to Travel

2012-01-24T00:34:00.000-08:00

I'm hoping that my day job at The Price is Right Live! keeps me busy and happy for many years. That being said, the opportunity to take vacations diminishes greatly with this job. Not a big deal. I've had many and I've had none at different points throughout my career and I know how to amuse myself quite well.

I do manage to get a couple of days off a week and can be on a plane or in a car headed to somewhere every Sunday at 4:30. So...

I'm hoping to make brief trips at least once a month throughout the year. With luck I'll be able to do this once a month and not ruin the money I'll be making from the show nor the savings I'm trying to build.

Some of the places I plan to visit will be places I've been before. Others will be new to me. Sometimes I hope to visit friends. Other times I hope to make new ones.

This month I head to Phoenix, AZ to visit friends and enjoy a little r&r in a familiar location. Next month...who knows? Locations I hope to enjoy in my two-day increments include...

Memphis
Nashville
San Francisco
San Antonio
Portland
Orlando
??????

Any suggestions?

Down the road, I'm hoping and praying that this is the year I get my book published and spend my days off on a book tour, signing & selling books, seeing the world, and truly living a dream—a good dream, that is.

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Read it Now Before the New Issue Hits!

2012-01-23T00:34:00.000-08:00

If you haven't read it yet, check out my latest column
at the North Las Vegas Voice.

They don't have a direct li nk, but if you click here
and go to page 16/17...there I'll be!

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Don't Forget Your Comedy Treasure!

2012-01-22T00:34:00.000-08:00

Their phrase, not mine. ;)
Read the complete article while you still can!

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I See the Irony

2012-01-21T00:34:00.000-08:00

I was completely unaware that yesterday was Penguin Awareness Day. I didn't even know there was such a day. Of course, I'm always aware of penguins so no big deal. An extra day of penguin fun is good for anyone.

But were you aware of the senseless slaughter of penguins going on in Las Vegas?

I'm sorry to report that countless (and extremely rare) Gargantuan Penguins, native to the Nevada desert have been found dead across the Las Vegas Valley. The official report is that they died of natural causes, but it has been rumored that fowl play is to blame. Natural causes? What penguin is found hanging about in a casino now that the penguins are gone from the Flamingo Hotel? Harumph!

Here you see the County's Penguin Coroner examining the
corpse of the elusive Gargantuan Penguin.

When I was there, I managed to find one lone Gargantuan Penguin still alive and desperate for escape. Sadly, he later perished gorging himself at the buffet.

OR...maybe these are photos of the workers removing the Christmas decorations at the Bellagio's Conservatory and getting ready for the Chinese New Year. I forget.

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Happy Chinese New Year

2012-01-20T11:13:00.000-08:00

Do the Chinese make resolutions for the new year?

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Made Me Laugh

2012-01-19T00:34:00.000-08:00

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COMP YOU!

2012-01-18T00:34:00.000-08:00

Expect one, if not a few, full-length columns from me about this particular subject in the future.

Now, more than ever, I am asked for free tickets to shows. They're simply known as "comps."
Being in Las Vegas everyone assumes I have a hook-up for every show in town. I suppose it isn't that hard to believe that I'm friends with every headliner in town. I am awesome after all.

However, while I cannot lay claim to any pull with EVERY show in town, I generally do have limited control over offering comps for shows that I am in . When it is a friend of mine, I am usually happy to offer comps for my own show.

What I am not happy to do is offer comps for a show only to find out that you (my friend) are not going to show up and claim them! These shows are hard enough to sell tickets to, especially since everyone in Las Vegas (the locals) believes they're entitled to free entertainment, even though these same locals never patronize the Strip & Downtown businesses. The shows need to pay their acts, pay for the room, pay for advertisement, pay for maintenance and bar staff—they rely on money coming in to the show in order to stay alive and running.

When you ask for a comp from me or any other entertainer in town, and you then GET that comp, you had BETTER show up to watch the show. We have to ask the producers for the freebies, knowing that there's that much less money coming into their production. To secure a comp and then not show up makes the act look bad adversely affects the show, my relationship with the producer, and the overall experience. Plus, I'll be that much less likely to treat you so nicely in the future. Why offer favors if they're not appreciated.

In short, if you get a free ticket from me or anyone else, show up. When you're there, pay for a drink, a souvenir, SOMETHING to show a little support. It's only right.

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Johnny Cash & Ray Charles - Busted

2012-01-17T00:34:00.000-08:00

Both men recorded individual songs about being poor and having nothing.
Both men recorded the song "Busted' and had hits with them.
Both men sang together on The Johnny Cash Show in a wonderfully fun duet.

Both men are forever among the all-time greats and favorites of Andy Land.

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Best Cover/Remake of a Song EVER!

2012-01-16T00:34:00.000-08:00

People get a bit high and mighty when someone covers or remakes a classic song, especially when it was a signature hit for someone else. I tend to believe if the work is of a high quality then it is more than acceptable for the music-loving market.

There will always be the good (Def Leppard covering '20th Century Boy'), the GREAT (Ike & Tina performing 'Proud Mary'), the bad (too many artists doing too many Beatles songs to choose) and the UGLY (Celine Dion singing 'Shook Me All Night Long').

Here is what I believe may be the greatest remake of a song ever. This artist (the one and only Ray Charles) unseats one of my favorite singers, a man who is responsible for many of the greatest remakes ever as well as the greatest original songs—the one and only Johnny Cash.

Please enjoy this truly precious performance of 'Ring of Fire' by Ray Charles on the Johnny Cash Show. It is breath-taking and beautiful. It simply doesn't get any better than this. I'm certain June & Johnny would agree if they could.

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Of COURSE, Andy Land is Still a Place for Penguin News!

2012-01-15T00:34:00.000-08:00

My Facebook page was on fire today with friends posting some exciting penguin news. And so, thanks to a little help from my friends, I offer you the story of the rare WHITE PENGUIN.

This penguin took over duties as a teacher and basketball coach of a predominantly black, inner-city school, teaching them not only skills on the court, but skills for life.

Or...maybe it was just a very cool looking white penguin. I forget.
May as well read for yourself.

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A Friendly Reminder: AndyMartello.com is BRAND NEW!

2012-01-14T00:34:00.000-08:00

If you haven't been there in awhile for a visit, or if you have never been there at all, please make sure to check out my main website, andymartello.com.

I have always been proud of my website since it truly did attract a lot of customers and was always very popular. Unfortunately, it got a little stale (updates not withstanding) after about 2005, when it was 5 years old. More unfortunate is the fact that I had neither the time nor the money to do a total overhaul.

In 2011 that all changed and a newer, streamlined, ultra-hip andymartello.com was born!

Please be certain to check out The Ultra-Lounge of the Internet and refer me to anyone looking for the best in comedic entertainment.

AGENTS: You can use www.BookAndy.com when referring clients. No contact information of any kind is there and you'll be cashing a commission check in no time.

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Welcome back, Sinsation!

2012-01-13T00:34:00.000-08:00

First night back for Sinsation The Show. Lucky me...I am the ONLY male cast member of this awesome comedy burlesque show this weekend. I know...my life is pretty tough.

Check out the Sinsation website to not only learn about the show (or buy tickets) this weekend at the Royal Resort, but to see just HOW lucky a man I am. ;)

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When did I become a tech guy?

2012-01-12T00:34:00.000-08:00

In less than a month's time I have gotten a cool laptop, upgraded my phone to the current whiz-bang-top-of-the heap thing, and now I'm rocking a Blue Tooth device. Of course, I'm not rocking a DOUCHE device like so many self-important Cybermen wannabes out there. Those things are THE WORST!

No, I'm rocking this way cool, around-the-neck headset thing. It also makes for kick-ass stereo headphones too.

If I ever learn how to use it, I'll be a rock star.

What's next? A tablet? Stay tuned.

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Broken Premises at the North Las Vegas Voice

2012-01-11T00:34:00.000-08:00

Don't forget to check out my column every month in the North Las Vegas Voice newspaper, online or in print. This month's column, Broken Premises is available on page 16 and discusses the many 2011 movie offerings that dealt with things like hot chick bosses sexually harassing ugly dudes (not possible) and hot people needing "f@$! buddies" (also not possible).

So check it out and let me know what you think.
Better yet, LIKE the North Las Vegas Voice on Facebook and tell them how much you love my work. ;)

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Check out the official website of The Price is Right LIVE!

COME ON DOWN to The Price is Right Live!

2012-01-10T00:34:00.000-08:00

I'll be back at my, "day job" tomorrow and you're invited to join the fun!

Come see me perform a little audience warm-up & comedy, reading all the prize copy and saying the three most iconic words in all of game show history, "COME ON DOWN!" at The Price is Right LIVE! Our host from now until April is the one and only Mr. Joey Fatone.

The Price is Right LIVE! is at Bally's Hotel & Casino Wednesdays through Sundays at 2:30 PM.

Tickets are available at the Bally's box office or at the Bally's website. Hope to see you there.

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Andy Martello: A Comedy Treasure Making Headlines

2012-01-09T00:34:00.000-08:00

Here's an even easier way to read the recent Marengo-Union Times article about yours truly.

Just CLICK THIS LINK and enjoy!

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In case you didn't know...

2012-01-08T10:24:00.000-08:00

Marc Ecko Cut & Sew is the official couture of
Andy Martello.

Someday I'll get free clothes from them for saying that.

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Sinsation "The Show"

2012-01-07T00:34:00.000-08:00

I am very pleased to announce that Sinsation The Show is returning to Las Vegas in a new location. Of course, I am more pleased to say that I will be returning as their featured comedic/variety performer.

Sinsation is a most excellent comedy/burlesque show with music, comedy, beautiful dancers, and of course...yours truly!

You can watch me (OK, you'll probably be watching the girls) during the debut weekend at their new home, The Royal Resort, 99 Convention Center Drive (adjacent to the Strip) in Las Vegas.
Don't miss the fun January 13, 14, & 15 at 7:30PM.
For tickets please call 702-735-6617 or visit the Sinsation website.

LIKE Sinsation The Show on Facebook.

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A Little Love from the Home Town

2012-01-06T00:34:00.000-08:00

If you take a look at the front page of the Marengo-Union Times this month you'll see a rather familiar face.

NO! Not the kids throwing snowballs! Under them...the guy who looks like me. See? That's me!

In a nice little piece of press from Betsy Wolfe Stemple you can read a lovely career overview and interview with yours truly. It is always nice to get a chance to let the home town crowd know what I'm up to these days and I'm very happy with the article. Who wouldn't like being" a Marengo Comedy Treasure", right?

If you'd like to read it you can head to the Marengo-Union Times website or simply click on the image below. If you like the piece be sure to go to their Facebook, Twitter, or Blogger pages and let them know.

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El Rey Club Updates: A Roll of the Dice, a Big Fan (Dancer), and a Good Sign.

2012-01-05T18:00:00.000-08:00

I hope you will excuse this long post, but it has been far too long since I've paid any quality attention to this blog, specifically any El Rey Club updates.

Some of the reasons for not adding more to the blog has been due to me finally tackling the chore of writing the book. I actually finished the first draft roughly around October/November of 2010. Since then there have been revisions, new drafts, and the tireless task of trying to find a literary agent and/or publisher. While I can't claim to be at my wit's end regarding my hopes to sell the book, I can say that it is TOUGH getting an agent to take a look at your work. I continue to push forward, I continue to revise as new information comes about, continue to find this book a home, and continue to add to the collection of memorabilia.

The section of this blog (and my El Rey blog) dealing with my collection is sorely out of date as well. This will be rectified whenever I get my scanner back up and running and when I have the time to do all the work. That being said, let's address how exciting the end of 2011/beginning of 2012 has been regarding new El Rey items and information.

If you recall, I'm ALWAYS collecting items like dice, poker chips, advertising items and the like. Truthfully, ANYTHING that survived the years I try to get my hands on somehow and I've had tremendous luck over the years. Among the things I have been hoping to get a hold of are these rare dice, pictured on the right. I was told close to 7 years ago that these were not for sale. That was then.

Some time in 2011 I was able to secure the purchase of the single die on the lower left of the photo. The seller told me he was liquidating his collection and promised me he'd keep me posted if the others came up for sale.

Right after the ball fell and 2011 turned into 2012 I was able to purchase the others in this image at what can only be termed as "a fair price." I pride myself on buying items at a fair price whenever possible, especially in this economy. For me, if I have the money, I want the seller to know I'm honest and eager to preserve the history all while keeping him happy to let something go from his collection (it is harder to do than you think). Plus, I truly believe that for all of the times I don't haggle, even occasionally overpay for something, the karma and good faith comes back to me later on. There have been plenty of items I've received as gifts, as trades, or simply at a better price than others would have paid because of the devotion I've had to this project.

This kind of karma came around for a very special visit!

Right before the New Year began I received a phone call from Mike Madden of Searchlight, NV. He's a long-time resident of the area and his aunt owned the Kaye Motel in Searchlight. He's quite a character and a fixture in Searchlight with many friends and quite a collection of STUFF. By his own definition he is a big-time hoarder.

On the 29th of December he stumbled upon a rather fascinating item and remembered hearing about some random guy interested in all things El Rey Club. It didn't take him long at all to locate me.

He mentioned that he had quite a few copies of newspaper articles pertaining to the El Rey. He had donated the originals years earlier to the Searchlight Museum and thankfully, thought to keep copies for himself.

These articles featured some amazing things. Advertisements for the "Premier Performance" of Peggy DeCastro, stories advertising the filming of Jerry Schafer's Wide Open Spaces, a photo of the very first airplane to arrive at Willie's airport—quite a treasure trove of information that will surely add to the story, if not my workload.

Mike then mentioned he had an original photo of the one and only Sally Rand, used to promote her appearance at the El Rey. You may recall that Rand appeared at the El Rey New Year's weekend in 1960. This photo had a sticker on the back referring to her appearance at the El Rey and her willingness to sign the photo in between performances.

He told me what he had found lying in the desert a few thousand feet from where the El Rey once stood and sent me some photos from his phone. The images really did not help give a better idea of what he had found but his description, along with the promise of "new" archival footage intrigued me enough to plan a visit to Searchlight.

We met at the Searchlight Nugget Casino where he presented me with an envelope with the aforementioned newspaper articles as well as the Sally Rand photo. Needless to say I was already giddy to be holding such a piece of history. It's cool enough to have a new piece of El Rey history in my hands, but something that in all likelihood Sally Rand herself touched? Super-geek moment for me.

He told me I was free to make copies of all the articles for my own collection, which certainly made me very happy. I was afraid to ask, but I told him if he ever felt he could part with the Sally Rand photo I'd be happy to pay a fair price. He smiled and pushed the photo next to me along with all the news clippings and said, "You just take that home with you."

My mind was blown! I insisted on paying him something for the image and he just shook his head and said, that's yours now. Indeed it is! Don't believe me? Here's a photo!

Apologies for the quality of the image.
My scanner is out for the moment.

Next it was time to see what he found in the desert. He said he had found a sign, he described it as a billboard, that had some advertising for the El Rey. He described it as pretty large, but I got the impression from the photos he sent that it may have been a Chamber of Commerce sign with many of the local businesses advertised. Regardless, I thought if there were some original advertising from the place that survived after baking in the desert all these years, I would surely want it!

We drove just down the road a spell and then made a very short walk into the desert. Truthfully, it was barely off the edge of the highway. There, face up on the ground, completely invisible from the road and something you'd only find if you happened to be walking past it, was a 12-foot long by 5-foot tall, hand-painted sheet metal sign, faded and sandblasted from nearly 60 years worth of desert weather. The billboard was framed nicely in dried redwood and what remained of the ground posts stuck out from the bottom. A quick glance gives you no reason at all to think anything of it (nor will my own photographs). Closer examination and you can CLEARLY read the block letters...

Open 24 Hours Lovely Scenic Bar
EL REY CLUB

Of the items I've managed to get into my collection that clearly fall into the "this just shouldn't exist anymore" category, this has to be on the very top. It once stood alongside Hwy 95 as you headed north about 1500-2000 feet away from the El Rey, most probably since the 1950s. It was likely removed to make way for the MASSIVE BIG-TIME BILLBOARD nest to the Terrible's Casino and the McDonalds in Searchlight today. If I were a betting man, I'd wager that the sign was painted by Bob Martello himself.

What's remarkable about this sign, aside from the fact that it survived in the first place, was the relatively great condition it was in. Very little rust outside from the many nails and bolts holding the sign together. Some original paint and colors are visible. There are NO bullet holes, NO graffiti, nor any of the typical damage (aside from weather wear) you'd find in a small, remote town on an ancient, forgotten road sign. Quite possibly...the find of the century for me!

Mike was describing ways to get it free from its desert home and had even taken time to cover it in plastic so no further damage would happen. We both felt that even one more desert rain could tear away all the history.

I began asking if he wanted a finder's fee or some kind of payment for this great item. Let's face it, no matter how old you are, "Finder's KEEPERS!" can always come into play, especially in a mining town. He just smiled again and said, "How are you going to get this home?"

THAT is the kind of karma I'm talking about. I've done so much research, worked so hard to learn and preserve history, and spent the kind of money on "junk" that only people with silly hobbies can justify, and when it has mattered the most, great gestures of kindness and generosity come along to offset the effort and expense. These gifts have come from Willie's family, other collectors,interview subjects, and now from a guy I'd only met an hour previously. Just like that, I had not one, but two pieces of El Rey history that simply shouldn't have survived the years. The big payment that Mike accepted? One cold bottle of beer.

While the patina that comes from antiquity is very cool, I've decided one of my goals for the year is to get the sign fully restored. If all goes well, I'll get it on American Restoration and make it so it looks the way it did along that Nevada highway and hang it on my wall. Maybe even commission a miniature version that I can bring to shows and future book signings. Who knows?

So there's more than enough El Rey update to satisfy your curious soul. I still revise and expand upon the book while waiting for a YAY or NAY from a publisher that has stressed a serious interest in the book. I know I've had some amazing luck with this silly, remarkable hobby and believe me when I say I am truly grateful. I'm choosing not to look at this recent burst of El Rey-centric fun as mere luck, but quite literally, a good "sign" that this will be a great year.

While many of the El Rey posts have been temporarily removed from the blog to protect the upcoming book, you may still get caught up on a lot of the El Rey Club news by clicking HERE or HERE.

If YOU are a literary agent or publisher looking for a fascinating page-turner to release, or someone with information or artifacts relating to Willie Martello's El Rey Club, contact me immediately at 702-465-5604 or andy@andymartello.com

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Plate-Spinning Video Approaching 25,000

2012-01-04T00:34:00.000-08:00

Hard to believe, but the video of me spinning plates on WGN along with comedian/actor, Anthony Anderson is 100 away from hitting the 25,000 views mark on YouTube.

Sure, I know that in this age of viral videos and the like, 25,000 is no big deal. That being said, I'm mighty proud to say I have one of the most popular plate-spinning videos on YouTube. This particular appearance was a lot of fun as well as a great way to promote just how I can incorporate the plate-spinning routine into a different setting, teaching others how to spin on-site.

I've done this exact thing for some of the biggest companies in the world. Coca-Cola, Boeing, Harley-Davidson, Blue Cross/Blue Shield, Bridgestone/Firestone and many others have brought me in as a consultant for on-the-spot training in proper time management, hitting home corporate message points using a permanent eye-catching visual aid. The plate-spinning act continues to surprise me in how it continues to keep me busy.

Please help take this video past the 25,000 mark by watching and sharing the video on your Facebook pages, your blog, or simply by emailing it to your friends. If you find you're having a problem coming up with a killer corporate presentation, then having this video in your mind can't hurt either.

Who knows? If enough people see this one video, perhaps my dream of spinning plates on the David Letterman show (with Dave spinning by my side) can finally come true!

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Boy Howdy!

2012-01-03T11:36:00.000-08:00

I DO work with some PURDY people!
Yours truly with the cast of The Price is Right LIVE!

Come on down to Bally's Hotel & Casino,
Wednesdays through Sundays at 2:30PM.

Tickets are available at the Bally's website.
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www.facebook.com/andymartelloentertainment

LIKE. Share. Repeat.

2012-01-02T17:55:00.000-08:00

Until I come up with funny and fascinating blog fodder for you, please head to my Facebook fan page and click LIKE. Tell your friends and have them join the party.

Remember, share the link...share the love. ;)

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Blowing the dust off...

2012-01-01T22:35:00.000-08:00

I can't help but realize that I have severely neglected this blog for a very long time. Apologies. Far too much going on in Andy Land to get into right now, but the blog has taken...what's farther away than a back seat? A sub-basement sewage tank? Anyway...

I never make resolutions, but I will try to post something every day, if not every week. Get you caught up and all that.

Until then, please read my first column of 2012 in the North Las Vegas Voice newspaper. "Broken Premises" appears on page 16.

If you like it, don't forget to mention it at their Facebook page. If you don't...just shut the hell up and move on, PUNK! ;)

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http://www.priceisrightlive.com/

BREAKING NEWS! My Day Job...

2011-08-30T19:08:00.000-07:00

Every entertainer gets asked, "What's your day job?" If you are a very fortunate performer, your day job is actually a gig somewhere in entertainment. Either on stage or back stage, whether being the act or booking the act, if you are in entertainment and your "day job" is somehow related to entertainment, that is about as good as it gets this side of the fame and fortune thing.

I was very lucky to have been able to say I've made a living in entertainment for over 25 years. The best time for me (pre-Vegas) would have to be when I was working as an agent/producer for Custom Comedy Capers in Naperville between 2000 and 2007. I rarely ever had to ask for time off due to a gig. Being run by entertainers Jim Bina & Jamie Newell, they understood. This was a W2 gig and it made filing taxes a lot easier at year's end. Plus, when you are the one answering the phone at an entertainment agent's office, it makes being the guy called for a gig that much easier. ;)

Today, I started the two-week trial period for what I hope will become my new day job. If all goes well during this two weeks and the producer, cast, and crew continue to like my work, this new day job will be even more rewarding and exciting than the good old Custom Comedy Capers days. It's been around a month in the making with several meetings and auditions along the way. Getting past this two weeks with flying colors is the final step towards being able to pop the Champagne and not just sip the expensive beer.

Today, I am over-the-top excited to be able to say I started my job as the on-stage announcer for The Price is Right LIVE! at Bally's Hotel & Casino.

I'm the guy doing the audience warm up and whipping the crowd into a frenzy. I'm the guy reading the copy informing the audience about the fabulous prizes. Most significantly, I'm the guy who gets to call out the three most iconic words in game show history, "Come on down!"

Most important to this scenario is that, pending the extension of my contract, I'll be making a very good living wage performing daily in a long-running and steadily-drawing show with massive brand name appeal and huge potential for bigger and better things. This one is a big deal for me!

The show runs Tuesdays through Saturdays at the fabulous Jubilee Theater primarily in the afternoons (2:30PM show), with one evening performance being at 7:30PM on Fridays. So not only is this a good gig in general, but it leaves a lot of wide open space for corporate work or even landing a spot on a variety show here in town at night. In ways most wouldn't realize, this is a dream job. It's fun, t pays a living wage (and is a W2 job), it offers potential for many more opportunities down the road, and so far everyone I've been fortunate enough to work with has been nothing but friendly and welcoming. I simply can't express fully how excited and honored I am to have this opportunity.

The pessimist in me wanted to wait until the two-week trial was over and a bigger contract was in place. I just couldn't wait because this is big news, loads of fun, and well worth sharing.

If anyone wants to check out the show while in Vegas, details are at this website.

http://www.ballyslasvegas.com/EventsDetail.do?detailName=the-price-is-right-live-detail&locationCode=BLV

Don't ask me for comps if you want to play the games on stage. Comps are ineligible. ;)

Thanks to everyone for all the well-wishes and continued support along the way. Here's hoping for even more big news to share very soon.

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Andy Martello New Columnist for North Las Vegas Voice

2011-08-29T23:18:00.000-07:00

The first issue is out!

click image for larger view

I am now a regular columnist for the
North Las Vegas Voice newspaper.

This is a monthly paper dealing primarily with issues specific to
North Las Vegas, Nevada.

Here's hoping I can help the paper grow as well as
develop a bigger following for my writing.

You may read the full paper by visiting the
North Las Vegas Voice website.
(I'm on page 12)

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On This Date in Andy Martello History...

2011-08-08T09:10:00.001-07:00

If you opened the Rockford Register Star that morning you'd learn about my appearance at the Boone County Fair as part of the Reynolds Family Circus.

This represented just one of the many times I'd had an opportunity to work with these great friends but it was also something of a homecoming for me.

Years earlier I had won the Boone County Fair talent contest and this was the first time in a lot of years since I was able to return to the fair grounds and have some fun.

I was also able to visit many friends & teachers from high school, family members, my old home town—a lot of reminiscing was being done that week.

Aside from the newspaper article
(click image for a larger view) I have included a few snapshots taken by my mother who was in the front row for a few shows.

She bore witness to the time I sliced my finger open while juggling sugar cane knives...and didn't even notice! I must have been one great master of manipulation and misdirection even then. There was rather a lot of blood. Oh well, that's showbiz.

Pictured are Mariel Reynolds, aka Mariel A LaMode, Bill Reynolds, and the legendary Gabbs Valley Gabby.

You may recall Gabby from my now infamous tale of what it is like to shower with a horse. You read that correctly.

Don't believe me? Click here.

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The Ultra Lounge of the Internet is Open for Business!

2011-07-25T11:42:00.000-07:00

I am very pleased to announce the
NEW & IMPROVED

www.andymartello.com

Modern. Super-Cool. User-Friendly.

The Ultra Lounge of the Internet!

Go. Play. BOOK ME!

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On This Date in Andy Martello History...

2011-07-20T00:35:00.001-07:00

Those who know me well, know I rarely
pass up an opportunity to

A) Blow my own horn
B) Ridicule myself.

Today I get to do BOTH!

Enjoy reading this article about yours truly from July 20, 1988.
Printed in the Marengo Star Newspaper and
preserving my truly awful fashion & style choices for eternity.

Click the image to see a larger view and to read the whole story.
I had hope for my future back then.
Age has mellowed my enthusiasm.
Reality has crushed my soul. LOL!

Jeezus-F@#%! Did I own a mirror?

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The Dyson Accordion, By Andy Martello

2011-07-01T14:07:00.000-07:00

Please enjoy my latest comedy video and vote "FUNNY" at
FunnyOrDie.com, if you'd be so kind.

The Dyson Accordion - watch more funny videos

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Help Andy's Plate-Spinning Act Get Booked on Fox & Friends!

2011-06-28T11:39:00.000-07:00

Steve Doocy was waxing nostalgic about plate-spinners on the Ed Sullivan Show recently. Imagine how quickly Fox & Friends received an email from me offering my services.

I think performing a segment with Doocy would be a great way for me to launch my "Get Plate-Spinning Week on Letterman" campaign, don't you? It could look something like this...

I NEED YOUR HELP! GET MY ACT ON FOX & FRIENDS AND EVENTUALLY...LETTERMAN!

Start off by sending an email to Fox & Friends at Friends@foxnews.com or leave a comment for Steve Doocy at his official Facebook page.

______________________________________

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Sahara Hotel Closing on May 16

2011-05-13T23:16:00.000-07:00

Who do you think Channel 8 News asked about it?

Can't see the video? CLICK THE LINK!

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Andy Martello: THE Plate-Spinner!

2011-05-11T08:28:00.000-07:00

Time for a little plate-spinning fun!

As you know I am "The Last GREAT Plate-Spinner." I enjoy spinning plates for shows as well as in a corporate training seminars.
I've spun plates on national television commercials.
I've spun plates for major corporations.
I've spun plates as the opening act for the wonderful Gladys Knight.

I recently did a search on You Tube for plate-spinners and it turns out that the 2nd most popular plate-spinning video happens to belong to yours truly! If enough people see this and share the link, perhaps we can change all that and make me #1. ;)

Here I am spinning plates on the WGN Morning News
with comedian Anthony Anderson.

Watching that you can see that you don't have to be a professional plate-spinner to have fun at it. Keeping that in mind, here's my world famous PLATE SPINNING GAME from my soon-to-be-updated website.

Click to Play

This game was a viral hit long before there was such a thing. Within weeks of hitting the internet back in 2000, I was getting emails from people around the globe telling me how much fun they were having playing this silly game and how they were emailing the link to friends. This game made the office email circuit years before a You Tube or ANY talking baby videos!

Lastly, here's the aforementioned commercial I was in. This ad ran on nationally CNN, FOX News, & MSNBC and locally in specific Congressional Districts across the country. It landed me in the pages of the New Yoprk Times as well as several newspapers and magazines. It still draws a lot of attention, if not gives a great example as to just why anyone in the TV game gives ole Andy a call when they need top-quality plate-spinning talent!

Feel free to give me a call and book this plate-spinner for your next event. I'd be happy to do it for ya.

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THIS WEEK IN ANDY MARTELLO HISTORY!

2011-05-07T08:28:00.000-07:00

May 5, 1988, found my young and ugly mug featured in the pages of the Northwest Herald newspaper. Click image for larger view.

The interview was conducted in between a series of school shows and conducted/written by Kurt Begalka, who has interviewed me a number of times. I was 17 years old about to make it to 18 and eagerly awaiting results from my application to Ringling Bros. Clown College. I still use some of the jokes in here...and forgot about some good ones. Hmmm...

Among the cool things about this article:

I was issued a special pass from my principal to miss classes and take these paid gigs for the students of Zion Lutheran, Hawthorn, and Riley elementary schools
It details pretty well the "EUREKA moment" I had while trying to learn to juggle
While I'm not at all as famous as I'd promised in the piece, I am STILL WORKING!

Among the bad things:

What was up with my hair?
What was up with my costume?
Again...my hair?

This was a very nice article and I'm happy I still have a copy in the Andy Archives to share with you.

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